How I know I have PMS

1) Everyone around me has an attitude problem
2) Chocolate has become one of the basic food groups
3) The dryer has shrunk every last pair of my jeans (weird how this happens)
4) My husband is agreeing with everything I say
5) I'm using my cell phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says, "How's my driving? Call 1-800--."
6) Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7) I'm convinced there's a God and He's male.
8) I'm counting down the days until menopause.
9) I'm sure that my kids are scheming to drive me crazy.
10) The ibuprofen bottle is empty and I bought it yesterday.